Parshat Vayechi

 

Parshat Vayechi closes the story of our forefathers with Jacob blessing his sons in his last days, however, the drama of Joseph and his brothers continues. It has been the main theme over the last few weeks, and was clearly part of Hashem’s master plan to bring about the exile. Right at the end of the Parsha, almost as an afterthought, after bringing Jacob to rest in Hebron, we return to the strained relationship between Joseph and his brothers.

The Torah presents a detailed account of the bothers’ concern that Joseph will take revenge and they send a message to Joseph, saying, “Your father commanded us before he died to say to Joseph, forgive your brothers the sins and the wrongs they committed in treating you so badly.” When their message reaches Joseph, he weeps and reassures them and tells them not to fear and he will take care of them and their families. It is not clear whether Jacob actually said this, or was even aware of what the brothers had done, but they were frightened of how Joseph would treat them, now their father was not around.

The passage opens with the brothers saying “Maybe Joseph holds a grudge against us and will pay us back for all the wrongs we did to him?” opening using the word “lu” for maybe. This short two letter word provides interesting different translations of the brothers’ concerns, depending on which English translation you inspect. Even Rashi is unsure as to whether the brothers are saying “maybe” or “surely” or “what if” he will hate us. Well, one may ask what difference would it make?

On the one hand one can see the “maybe” as a sense of anguish, as it would seem that after Jacob died, Joseph did not come to Goshen any more to visit. Also, the Midrash tells us that on the return from burying Jacob, Joseph visited the site where the brothers had thrown him into the pit. So, they were not sure and thought only maybe Joseph held a grudge against them.

An alternative understanding is that the brothers really hoped that Joseph still held a grudge against them and he had waited for the opportunity to get his own back in some way. The Netziv explains that the brothers really did want Joseph to treat them badly, to give them some justification for their evil deeds. If Joseph would now punish them in some way, then they could then feel some vindication for their actions. However, Joseph responded exactly the opposite and reassured them and spoke to them kindly saying “Don’t be afraid. I will provide for you and your children.”

The Ktav Sofer notes that the brothers then approached Joseph and offered to become his slaves. They were thinking that Joseph might do as they had done to him and sell them off as slaves. They were pleading that if he had that in mind, please don’t sell us off as slaves to some strange land, but let us be servants to you and your household, but Joseph would not hear of it. Interestingly Joseph is often referred to as “Yosef Hazadik” Joseph the righteous, and in his behaviour you can truly see this is justified. Maybe we can learn from Joseph how we should react when someone treats us badly.

There was a lovely article in last week’s paper about a lady whose father had died and as there were only daughters, she wanted to say kaddish with a minyan, which is a generally accepted practice by most authorities. In her work she moves around Israel a lot and her experiences were from acceptance and making sure to open up the ladies gallery or to find her somewhere for her to be and say kaddish, to one place where the minyan dispersed without waiting for her kaddish. She is not in any way angry but grateful for the opportunity she had which she felt helped her spiritually to come to terms with her father’s passing.

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